Shadow is Dead
He was lucky to have kind caretakers in his last days
Shadow lived rent-free in a single room occupancy situation for 18 years.
Bedbugs and bad air quality. But also a stocked pantry down the hall and a hot meal every night from the soup kitchen downstairs.
Towards the end he was not allowed into the dining area because of some behavioral transgressions. His tray had to be given to him outside so he could take it back to his room.
I remember him complaining that none of the people that came to help him were “white girls.” Medical and social workers are trained to deal with the racism that patients with dementia (or who are just plain racist) might exhibit, but it doesn’t make their jobs any easier. The people in charge of taking care of him did the very best they could with limited resources. Given his bad habits and difficult personality it’s a miracle that he lived as long as he did.
I logged some quality time with Shadow. Helped him carry in his groceries a few times. Conversed with him while he smoked outside. Marlboros. Two packs a day.
The end years of his life were not great. He survived into old age though - a victory many of us will never be able to celebrate.
—Alex
